The Great Captors
I was held prisoner in my own home for the whole of my twenties. “How is that possible?” - you may ask. It is utterly possible because Guilt and Fear are better at holding you prisoner than any bars, or ball and chain. They are much more effective at fettering, because they fetter the soul - the Self.
My mother fettered my soul with Guilt and Fear. With bars, or ball and chain, there is at least a key. At that time, I knew of no key that would release me from Guilt and Fear.
Guilt and Fear are the Great Captors, the very best wardens, the most efficient and effective prison guards. They will lock you away to wander a maze of darkness, and will gladly leave you there for life.
The White Tiger has covered the etiology of Guilt and Fear, and why it is so powerful that it drives most unconscious/subconscious human behavior. Before “The Keys” Series moves forward, it is imperative to grasp the etiology of the power. Although this has been touched upon, and even discussed modestly, in order to utilize “The Keys” that you are about to be given, this understanding needs to be cemented into ground.
The Power
I sometimes ask my clients, if you never had to engage with another human being again, how much less stress would you have? You can answer that pretty easily for yourself. You would have so much less stress, you would probably float above the ground - or at least feel like it.
Pause and consider this one thought for a moment: Almost all suffering of the human psyche is precipitated by/caused by OTHER humans.
Your cat doesn’t make you suffer, it relieves your suffering. Your dog does not make you suffer, it relieves your suffering. A walk in the woods does not make you suffer, it relieves your suffering. What caused your suffering?…some form of human engagement.
What is the power in human engagement that is so great that it creates psychological suffering and drives human behavior? We need to understand how it renders this effect (How does it do it?). In understanding from whence the power cometh - we can find the exact place to stop it.
THE POWER COMES FROM WITHOUT! What does that mean? It means that Guilt and Fear are caused by EXTERNAL sources! It comes from OTHER!
The SELF, and it's development, is informed by the response of the world around it-namely OTHER. It is from OUTSIDE of our SELF that we receive the message of not being good enough. That is not our assessment of our SELF by our SELF - that is the assessment of OTHER - transmitted by feedback that carries the inherent and unspoken threat of rejection - therein lies The Power.
The Prison
How does the power in human engagement render it’s effect? BY MAKING YOU BELIEVE THAT YOU NEED EXTERNAL VALIDATION.
This is holding you hostage to the approval of OTHERs.
This is Psychological IMPRISONMENT.
Locked in the prison of needing external validation, warded by Fear and Guilt, is the bullet train to a maze of darkness, despair, loneliness, and unhappiness, ie teen suicides and social media.
This is Bondage of the most egregious form. This is the fettering of the soul - the Self.
If you did not believe that you needed external validation, the threat of rejection would be as empty and powerless as a hollow log rotting on the ground.
If we never had feedback from another human being, we would never have self doubt, self judgement, self denigration, self deprecation. We would neither know nor understand any of those things. We would only have internal feedback, INTERNAL VALIDATION, which would not need, nor know, to self indict. We would have Psychological Freedom.
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The White Tiger is written sequentially. To gain the greatest understanding it is recommended, and helpful, to read The White Tiger beginning with the original post forward. All preceding posts can be accessed by clicking this link https://substack.com/@thewhitetiger